Hey macademia nut, everyone touts you as the greatest nut that ever lived. I would have to say you are my 21st favorite nut. Really, I would rather eat a Brazil nut than you. You think that because you come from one of the most beautiful places in the world that you are the most beautiful nut in the world. Well you're wrong! Your flavor isn't anything special, and in terms of crunch factor, news flash all nuts are crunchy!
And besides your flavor, your shape is ridiculous, you look like a freaking garbanzo bean. Why don't you get together with some garlic and go make some hummus instead of taunting me. Seriously you think I want to pay $10 for a teeny tiny can. I could be eating four times as many peanuts for that price! No one wants to pay bonuses to AIG's executives for doing a crappy job, and we shouldn't be charged a premium for an underachieving nut masquerading as a king.